The last sunset of the year and I got to somewhat. Well if seeing glimpses of it for more then 3 min. From trees and branches then yeah the first and last sunset if 2012 I'll ever see.
As I was starting this post off. I was thinking about how unfazed this whole year has been for me but then magically almost in neon lights pops up the year: 2014!!! The year I turn eighteen the year I graduate the end of the teen angst. I'm petrified mortified terrified and anything that means scared and could end with the suffic ied. I'm freaking out goodbye2012 it was nice sleeping all freaking year but it's time to get my shit together. I had one thing one fucking thing and I managed to fuck that up. I'm trying to avoid becoming a dysfuntional adult and trying to teach myself responsibility but it's so hard and im so tired and I haven't begun and I already know what not to expect but I'm still hopeful. I'm trying not to care about him but at the end of the day I don't cross his mind so, why is he constanly running in my thoughts. If I go back to all my rants,dilemmas, screw ups I can probably trace the exact moment where I went wrong. This fuckery didn't begin this year it began years ago. I'm not saying things will automatically change that life will become easier in this and in the following years. I just hope to god I have enough strength, wits and plenty of humor to get me along this journey. This isn't one of those Ccchhanges post because I know myself pretty damn well to know I'm not gonna do shit. I know what I've done and now I know how to avoid, conquer or just react to situations. I Had a lot of bad times this year but to say I didn't crack a smile once in a while would be a straight up lie. I had fun good times came and they left. Once it was over I was completley broken hearted. One of the most dramatic moments of the year had to be the time when mother nature came down with her wrath on me. I had a headache and every
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCgzX7vwlFk&feature=youtube_gdata_player
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